I’m getting married in the morning!

A century of Elvis...Image by maxgiani via Flickr

Ding Dong the bells are gonna chime! Here’s the deal, I have been proposed to for what I am hoping will be the last time in my life. Since I am currenlty married to the man who is the most perfect match for me (this is an important point for anyone thinking of becoming betrothed. Not that he is a perfect man; Mom, I’m looking at you here…he is not perfect, he just is perfect for me.) I keep trying to explain this to my children. It does not matter if the PERSON is perfect (as no one is), just if they are PERFECT for you.

I am running off to Vegas to marry my Guru Annie! We are going to have the wedding of our dreams…hers and mine of course, not our husbands. Aside: Sissy in my office says, if we are thinking of doing the whole Elvis Wedding thing we should seriously consider renting the PINK CADILLAC! I think this is a great idea!

Raynard and I had a long discussion tonight about it, and he is totally okay with me running off to Vegas and marrying my former BFF and 16th funniest BLOGGER on the planet. No strings attached. How could I get so lucky, as to find someone who would compliment me so completely that he is not challenged by my Union to Annie even if it is some foolish PR stunt to push people to her blog.

He made one point clear….we have to be SAFE. Now I have been told that Mercury is in retrograde and their is a good chance that I will get pregnant during the honeymoon. But Raynard has already accepted, loved and helped put through college two other bastard children. Really what’s the harm in one more?

The only real consensus I CARE about at this point is Lucy & Ethel’s opinion. If they find it morally reprehensible, of course I would not go through with it. I would not want to make light of what they are doing this weekend. (I went to dress rehearsal this evening and it made me cry! Two people so much in love, and they had readings from Plato, well, it was enough to bring this stone woman to her knees.)

So, I am off to the travel agency to book tickets. Oh Annie, my buddy James is totally in with getting us transgender bridesmaides! You don’t mind do you? Do I get to wear white? I mean Madonna did… how far off can I be?

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