Oh Holy Sheets… I OWN a Paula Poundstone trading card.

I am a simple girl, with barely any goals.  If I show up to work in the morning with matching shoes, I am high fiving people all day.  I feel, with these very low expectations in both myself and others, I find so much less disappointment with the world.

So, when I launched the new me… almost two years ago, I put absolutely no expectations on myself.

My goal was to write everyday.  I hit that goal one month.

It has been realized there is no way for me to accomplish my goal of writing everyday, work a 40 hour week, eat, bathe the important areas daily, dishes, vacuum, sort socks, travel to trainings for job, be a community volunteer, make sure the kids eat… something real (Annie I swear we are working toward whole foods) workout, take the dog for her weekly toenail clippings that I have missed for the last 3 weeks, laundry, satisfy husband and wipe the pee off the seat.  Oh, I could give up sleeping but I have decided to draw a line with sleep.  Plus, occasional I need to squeeze in some tweeting.

So I write when I write.  I shoot for 1 time per week.  But let’s face it.  I have failed there as well.

My loving husband Raynard and I recently had quite the unfinished discussion about the new me.  After I was asked by a friend to perform my little blog in a local talent contest Raynard laid down rules.  Rules he had never verbalized before.  Rules, that to this day have not been entirely worked through…. what I can tell you was I was ready to give it up, writing and all for good.

Then I received AN EMAIL FROM WHAT WE CAN ONLY ASSUME IS PAULA POUNDSTONE’S MANGER ‘CAUSE SHE SAID SO.

The email read:

Hi. I’m Paula’s Mgr. (for real).

I really enjoyed reading your column.

I never heard anything about a heckler – honestly, she gets so few of them and I’ve never heard of ONE that she couldn’t handle.

I am intrigued w/the trading card.

Is that for real.

I like the idea.

Nice writing on the blog.

Made me laugh.

Good luck with your talent.

Clue me in on the trading card if it is not a joke.
(Since you are stalking her, I hope you are on our mailing list: http://www.paulapoundstone.com). We let you know every month where she is performing (only blast once a month) and when she is on Wait Wait…

Have fun.

Sincerely,

Bonnie

It very well could just be one of my friends phucking with me.  I know ya’ll think I am stalking her, but I don’t know the details people.  If I was really peeping through her dining room window, I would be able to CONFIRM that Bonnie Whats-her-name really is her manager, worked there X amount of years, went to ABC University to Study Dr. Seuss but was disillusioned with the redundancy of rhyme and found a position with http://www.paulapoundstone.com/ reading obscure blogs for reference points.

I cannot officially confirm that Bonnie Whats-Her Name is Paula Poundstone’s manager.

I cannot deny it either.

Doesn’t matter.  Either way someone went far enough out of their way to create this clever hoax that Paula Poundstone’ manager

talked

to

ME.

From Nowhere, WY.

ON MY BLOG.

She left a comment.

On work I wrote.

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